Be brutally honest with yourself and embrace your scars if you want to experience real life
To protect him from infections, O’Leary’s entire body was covered in bandages. After the 8th month, the bandages were completely removed to let his skin feel the air. The scars on his body were now in full glare. It was not until then that he realized that there was a second type of bandage he needed to remove—the psychological bandage. He had bandages that covered up a painful past, difficult preset, and uncertain future.
The moment he saw himself in the mirror without any bandages was another inflection point for him. He had fought to survive the fire accident. Now, he must fight to embrace his scars. For the next two decades, he had self-imposed bandages. He was unwilling to share the miracle of his recovery. He would go about with long sleeves and pants. He didn’t like his wheelchair.
Many of us put on masks to cover up what we think the world would not approve.
Your life’s story uniquely sets you apart from the rest of the world and intimately connects you with others.
Since we were young, the problem of peer pressure has been with us. As adults, we still seek validation from groups, friends, and strive to be seen with the “right” people. Credit card debts are proof that we mask up. As long as we compare ourselves to magazine covers and celebrities, we will always come up short.
“99 The only comparison that matters is the comparison with who you are, who you were, and who you could become.”
John O’Leary
At 27, O’Leary entered into training to become a hospital chaplain. He had been successful as a real estate developer but wanted to work on a college campus. He didn’t know the training would be about consoling and providing comfort to people in their scariest and darkest moments. He thought it was going to be about working with students on campus.
Since he already applied and is not someone who quits whatever he starts, he decided to see the year-long training through. This training and the 3-year part-time chaplaincy experience that followed transformed his life and helped him to remove the mask he had been wearing since his accident.