Leaders need to understand and hone empathy
We often judge others in areas where we are most prone to shame. When people evaluate us, we tend to pass it on by criticizing others. Our curiosity and learning spirit create a desire to understand others. Seeing the world from somebody else’s perspective enhances empathy and reduces judgment.
“Wherever perfectionism is driving us, shame is riding shotgun.”
Brené Brown, Ph.D.
Empathy seeks to understand another person’s feelings and pay attention to the body language of all parties involved.
Creating a template for what to say or do to show empathy in any situation is challenging because it is about connection.
Being a complex skill that requires practice, you may get it wrong initially, but be ready to try again until you get it right.
Hence, empathy starts with treating yourself well. Sometimes, we tell ourselves what we cannot say to others in similar situations. Instead, we should talk to ourselves about how we want others to feel loved.
⚡️Self-kindness is tantamount to self-empathy.
Mastering empathy requires practice. The same goes for all other abilities leaders should learn. Leaders must develop fundamental skills through discipline. In sports, players learn skills they develop through regular practice. Sometimes, a player may wonder why they have to do 50 flip turns in a row instead of going straight to doing the sport itself. Training and acquisition of skills ensure knowledge enters the muscle memory, helping us face enormous challenges.
⚡️Leadership is not the apex of development; a leader should grow alongside the team.
Similarly, leaders must have the grounded confidence to face situations and conversations, make decisions, and keep their values intact while leading. Grounded confidence is a combination of rumble skills, curiosity, and practice. Rumble skills require setting the proper conversation and asking essential questions. Curiosity is the desire to know. A curious person takes time to listen, question, and identify the real problem rather than jumping to conclusions about perceived issues. The more we know, the more we want to know.
For Dr. Sanée Bell, the principal of Morton Ranch Junior High in Katy, Texas, practicing vulnerability enabled her to share her personal story with her staff, thus helping her team understand her purpose, passion, and commitment; it also allowed them to practice vulnerability.
Did you know? According to Raj Vardhman, 69% of Millennials believe leadership development is lacking in the workplace. Consequently, 91% will stay less than three years in a job.